How to handle fear of commitment in a relationship

9 Ways to Handle Dating a Commitment-Phobe | StyleCaster

how to handle fear of commitment in a relationship

It's not surprising commitment-phobes are afraid of commitment in other areas of their life and this reluctance isn't exclusive to you and your relationship. The first step is overcoming your fear of commitment is working out what . A relationship can actually be the greatest expression of your freedom, if you set it up. Jan 8, Here's the lowdown on commitment phobia and relationship anxiety. to want to change and find a way to overcome their relationship anxiety.

It can affect someone on issues as small as an agreement between friends to meet for coffee to as large a commitment as a decision about marriage. There are many reasons why people fear commitment. Not all reasons are the same for everyone but I want to share with you some of the more common ones that I notice in my practice that specializes in relationships.

Loss of Independence There are a lot of positive feelings associated with being in charge of your own life and not having to accommodate another person. For some, fear of giving up this ability to be in charge of their own time, space, money, friendships and decision-making can be scary.

5 Ways to Overcome Your Fear of Commitment | HuffPost Life

So much of what would be required in a commitment may be unknown and the unknown, in and of itself, may cause some to back away or erect walls to stay away from commitment. Ben, in the example above, worries about how commitment will affect his own independence. This is a factor for many who struggle with commitment issues. Fear of Intimacy Those who fear intimacy are afraid of letting anyone get to know them very well.

how to handle fear of commitment in a relationship

They find themselves unable to share their personal thoughts and feelings and keep relationships at a distance. While those with a fear of intimacy may agree to marry, they will have difficulty truly committing. Their guard always seems to be up. For some with fear of intimacy issues, this also includes sexuality.

7 Reasons Why You’re Afraid Of Commitment (And What To Do About It) | Thought Catalog

There may be a fear of learning more about their own sexuality or shame and embarrassment over sharing their bodies with another. There were times when she really needed for her to be there emotionally for her … and she was not.

6 Keys To Overcoming Commitment Phobia

When her mother died, Sharon did all of the right things but showed very little emotion and expected Sandy to be back on track within a week. She was afraid to let her emotions come to the surface. She learned very early in her life that recognizing feelings usually led to painful results.

Not Feeling Good Enough Many people grow up without a lot of positive experiences from significant people in their lives. They may feel unimportant, struggle with self-esteem issues or worry that they are not good enough to hold on to any partner. To keep from being rejected, they steel themselves from any long-term commitments.

how to handle fear of commitment in a relationship

Trust Issues Being afraid of intimacy and not feeling good enough are both factors in trust issues. While they still experience love like anyone else, the feelings can be more intense and scary than they are for most people. These feelings drive increased anxiety, which builds upon itself and snowballs as the relationship progresses — and the expectation of a commitment looms larger.

People with a commitment phobia long and want a long-term connection with another person, but their overwhelming anxiety prevents them from staying in any relationship for too long.

how to handle fear of commitment in a relationship

If pressed for a commitment, they are far more likely to leave the relationship than to make the commitment. Or they may initially agree to the commitment, then back down days or weeks later, because of their overwhelming anxiety and fears.

What is Commitment Phobia & Relationship Anxiety?

Some people with relationship anxiety may confuse positive feelings of excitement for another person and the potential of a relationship with the feelings of anxiety. For instance, normal feelings of anticipation or may be misconstrued by the person as a panic reaction, or general negative anxiousness.

how to handle fear of commitment in a relationship

Some may also just have a difficult time resolving the inherent conflict of romantic relationships — the craving of intimacy while wanting to retain their own individuality and freedom.

People with commitment issues come in all shapes and sizes, and their exact dating and relationship behaviors can vary. Some refuse to have any serious or long-term relationships longer than a week or a month, because of their fears.

how to handle fear of commitment in a relationship

Others may be able to be involved with one person for a few months, but as the relationship becomes more serious and deeper, their old fears again come to the forefront, driving the person away.